Joe had been under the impression that cricket was a small insect that hopped about in long grass. I had to be careful about expressions like silly mid on, as this started Joe laughing and caused the bicycle to wobble alarmingly about the road.
" Come on." said Joe walking out of the pavilion and swinging his cricket bat in a dangerous fashion around the top of his head. " Before it rains."
I walked slowly out of the pavilion trying to liook like a true cricketer, it was very bright outside after the smoke filled gloom of the pavilion, it was a lovely day. It was the kind of day you used to hear your grandfather saying you don't get any more, there was not a cloud in the sky and a skylark was singing overhead. I wandered slowly to the centre of the field and stood for a moment listening to the birds and savouring the moment of such a wonderful day.
There was a shout from someone near the other wicket asking if I had quite finished daydreaming as he would like to bowl a little bit. It was a very deep voice and quite broke my quiet meditation. What, who, where? I said suddenly realising there were other people about.
The bowler standing at the other wicket wittily suggested that as I had come out there with pads on holding a cricket bat he had assumed I just might be wanting to play a little cricket.
" Yes of course, ready when you are." I called gripped my bat in that very professional way you see great players use. I then tapped the end of my bat against the ground the way I had seen test cricketers do. I never did understand why they did that. I looked up ready to send the first ball for a six, or even perhaps a seven.
My mistake was looking up. At first I thought everyone was playing a joke on me and they had quietly pushed a steamroller up and parked it by the opposite wicket. Steamrollers however do not rub a cricket ball up and down on their trousers.
Blocking out half the sky at the other end was, well, King Kong in a white jumper, it was the biggest thing I ever seen not holding a banana. One thought suddenly started running around inside my head, that thing is going to throw a hard leather ball at me.
" Shouldn't one of us be at the other end? " said Joe.
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